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Monday 31 July 2006: Apparently he's said that reports of him preparing a leadership challenge are "fanciful". Just fancy that. In the Independent this morning, Charlie Kennedy did all but confirm his intentions. He was asked in the "You ask the questions . . . " section, "Can you envisage ever leading your party again?' And he replied: "Who knows what the future holds?'

It's not exactly the dance of the seven veils, is it? "Get your kit off!" the audience cries, and in one large motion he strips off six veils and his underpants.

There also a reminder of why he was so unsatisfactory as a leader. Another question went: "Do you regret not standing against Sir Menzies Campbell, Chris Huhne and Simon Hughes?'

He gave us a vintage example of wordy, ungrammatical, irrelevant, evasive, hair-splitting, sanctimonious, self-pitying drivel: "I wouldn't have seen such a contest as my standing "against" any other colleague, but instead a case of offering myself for re-election. The key point for me was that the leadership had to be decided by one member, one vote. The level of turnout demonstrates that my calling the election was the correct decision."

You might want to repeat that last sentence a few times to plumb the full depths of its fatuity. 

Col. Collins (Tory candidate, remember) blamed the Government. He said their penny-pinching was responsible. That they didn't plan ahead and hadn't got the supply chain working. Goodness knows there was a scramble at the time, soldiers with melting boots and no ammunition. It's amazing the report into it was more or less benign. 

But there was a political source for the rush and confusion. Right up until the last moment, Blair's line was "no decision has been taken". He couldn't order preparations without being accused of having made his mind up. Perception, as we know, is everything. Unless you're a sergeant who's had to give his body armour to someone else. 

It must be the case, mustn't it, that John Reid supervised the writing and the leaking of this document? It allows him to get this extraordinary figure into public circulation without the contamination of his utterance. My old ministerial friend used to use this trick by leaving the relevant document face down in the parliamentary photocopier for half an hour. Innocent days.

But what won't be justified by 45,000 criminals coming into the country?