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2008-05-02

THE STRANGE ATTRACTOR IN TORY POLITICAL HISTORY

3 May 2008
For the second time in a few short years, Boris determines the future of the Conservative Party. 

When he first got into the Commons, he walked straight into a leadership election. William Hague had resigned and people thought that MPs would vote Ken Clarke and Michael Portilo into the final two, to take their leadership campaigns to the country.

But Portillo's canvassing of Boris left much to be desired. He gave him prescient but insulting advice: "You have to decide whether you're a comedian or a politicians." 

Portillo failed to get into the last two by one vote. I'm assuming Boris' vote was the crucial missing one. Someone called Iain Duncan Smith went into the play-off instead and beat Ken Clarke (and set the Tory back five years in the process). 

And now Boris has ascended into political Elysium with his own mandate, his own powers, his own budget. If he does well, he will seal a Tory victory at the general election. If he does badly, Labour will use his record to impugn Cameron.The future is in his hands!

PS: "Watermelon smiles" and "Piccaninnies". You'd have to be slightly tone-deaf to mistake these remarks for racism. In his elegant, compressed way, Boris is imputing the patronising attitudes to Blair and the Queen.

"No doubt the AK47s will fall silent, and the pangas will stop their hacking of human flesh, and the tribal warriors will all break out in watermelon smiles to see the big white chief touch down in his big white British taxpayer-funded bird." 

"It is said that the Queen has come to love the Commonwealth, partly because it supplies her with regular cheering crowds of flag-waving piccaninnies; and one can imagine that Blair, twice victor abroad but enmired at home, is similarly seduced by foreign politeness."


THE END OF NEW LABOUR QED

Friday, 2 May 2008
Here's the political strategy of New Labour: Tony Blair and Gordon Brown. 

That's it. 

To triangulate you take your core vote for granted and make a pitch to your opponent's marginal vote. For Labour that means a Tory-type leader and a Labour-type Chancellor. 

A Labour-type leader without a Tory-type Chancellor makes no sense for this sort of project. So there we are. The end.

 

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